Setbacks suck. And it’s inevitable that one should occasionally stumble and stagger as they Bumble along their way. But they can really open your eyes. They make you reevaluate your process, and it’s a starting point for starting over, or starting on a new path.
About two or so years ago, I had a falling out of sorts with a musician I was hoping to tour with frequently.
Making music and touring was all that he seemed to do. He definitely had his shit together. He had ties to an indie record label that was pretty decent. Best of all, he like the music that I made, and he frequently would try to get his label affiliates out to the shows we would play together.
He was an intense performer, and an even more intense person and writer. Very heartfelt and sorrowful lyrics and he sang them with the utmost convictions. But he was unstable.
I had found out that he was a heroin addict toward the end of our first tour together. Obviously I became cautious, but honestly, from the time the we spent together, I felt that he was a decent guy. Besides, his first mention of the stuff was in conjunction with that fact that he was trying to kick the habit. So I gave him the benefit of the doubt.
At the end of our second tour together, I noticed just how paranoid and unstable a recovering heroin addict (or so he claimed) can be. He mistook a friendly gesture of a friend of mine – he came on tour with us to hang and take videos (drop me a line if you’d like to see them) – toward his lady friend as an advance, and accused my friend of being out of line.
Despite me vouching for my friend the entire tour, because he frequently expressed his doubts about his merit. It was completely unfounded.
Things blew up, and we had a falling-out of sorts.
I don’t think there is any bad blood on either end, but we just don’t talk anymore. And I think that’s for the best.
I traded a possible in for my music career for a more stable approach. It made me realise how much being a full time touring solo musician is an extremely hard job. A fact I already knew to some aspect, but now I felt that I had a fuller picture. Which is why I’m planning on starting a new path very soon.
Setbacks are either a brick wall in the road, or an chance to turn back. Regroup.